My last post seems to have confused a few people. What I was trying to express was that feeling that a lot of women get when they turn another year older. Wanting to hold onto our youth, wanting to not have to be one year older. That sort of thing. I was trying to express that I wasn't ashamed to be another year older because of all of the ways that I have grown in the years of my life. How I have triumphed over adversity if you will. Come through the rough to where I am today.
For some odd reason, certain people like to take credit for who I am just for the sheer excuse that they were a part of my life at some time. What they fail to realize is what role they played in this turmoil and how much of the drama and problems in my life were a direct result of their actions. I had to survive what they forced me to take on.
Something that these individuals don't realize is that who I am today is because of ME. Because of my strength and courage that I had to find deep down inside. Because I had to take these lemons and make lemonade, if you will. I find it completely odd that someone would try to see how their role that they fail to take responsibility for is a credit to me. I can assure you, it's not.
I have some really fantastic people in my life. Individuals along my road who have supported me, guided me, assisted me in any way they could to get me to where I am today. My gratitude and love for them is something I try to share every day. I do this by sharing my life with them. By telling them how much I care.
But by feeling this way I am labeled as angry, full of hate, less than what I claim to be because I have moved on and I have grown up from those moments in my life and choose not to continue to have that drama in my life. Unfortunately for me, these individuals continue to choose to remind me of those moments, of their actions that led to those moments, and accuse me of being less than I am for not allowing them to take this "credit" for their role in my life before.
Saying that you respect my decisions is one thing. Constantly harassing and stalking me to the point where I have to take this type of action is another. I really don't know how many times I can say "leave me alone" but it's starting to get old. Maybe one day these people will actually walk the talk and finally respect my wishes.