Christmas is over and this time of year makes me sad and tired. Which really sucks. The holiday was a total whirlwind. The weather made it even worse. Tuesday night I raced around in the snow to try and get the rest of the stuff for the next day so I could leave the city right at one. My brother broke his leg two weeks before and needed us to get the rest of his gifts. So that was my job the Tuesday night.
Christmas was so much fun of course with all the family and my nieces were just adorable. Wouldn't go to bed of course so Santa couldn't come until really late. And then we were all up early the next day. Which led to a really tiring day and one that ended just in time. My sister and I vegged out on Boxing Day and I came home the next day to do mountains of laundry and put everything away.
This week I'm off and I'm taking a few days to just lay around and get some stuff done around the house that I've been wanting to do. Like clean out closets and put stuff away. We're supposed to get another walloping of snow this week so that should be big fun (haha). I have a house party on New Years and then it's back to work next week. People can understand why I'm always so exhausted in the new year.
This time always makes me sad but more so this year. I feel like this year has been full of disappointments in all aspects of my life. Everyone always gives me a hard time about my decisions and what I do with my life so this year I decided it was time to put myself out there, do things that take me out of my comfort zone and just live a little. That worked out well. I was "rejected" in so many areas...my art, my work, my personal life, everything. It was just so hard to take month after month and this past month is no exception. It's like no matter how hard I try I just can't seem to get past this rut. So this year I'm just doing my own thing and playing to the beat of my own drum. I'm so tired of getting my hopes up and then having them dashed. If something good happens, something good happens but I'm afraid I'm not going to go looking for it. Sad really, but it's so much easier to protect myself than get hurt so much.
2 comments:
awww les....don't lose the faith kiddo...it's all we've got at the end of each day, this year was just lessons to be learned for all of us...things we can carry into the next year.
love you lots...just the way you are!
noelle, sean, lizzie allie
awww les, don't be discouraged...it was just a year of lessons to be learned after all, you were brave enough to put it out there, ended up back at school, (bravo) made a first attempt at something (and maybe you needed some practice so that you would be ready for another opportunity) and don't forget your big reward, ccsbb.
don't give up the faith kiddo, after all, its all we have to keep us going...love n s a e....
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