Sunday, April 12, 2009


So my oldest niece has figured out how to email me. Which is entirely too cute. But it's really opened up this big thought process for me and makes me wonder what/how my sister is a) thinking and b) handling things.

You see, for me, my niece is 3. She will always be 3. She will be 3 when she's dying her hair and painting her nails black. She will be 3 when she's out on her first date. She will be 3 when she walks down the aisle or gives birth. Do you get it? She's 3. And that's that.

So this morning I got up and had two emails. One from my sister and one from my niece. Apparently she is all set up with her own email address and everything and is sending me emails. And the emails are so cute I can't stand it. Then we decided to have a little online chat. And her online chat? So cute I can't stand it. I asked her if she wanted to webcam with me instead so I can see her cute little (3 yo) face but she said no, she LIKES TYPING BETTER. And then she starts spelling words wrong and asking me hilarious questions and telling me what we're doing when I come to visit.

See what I mean? CUTE! And 3!

So after a few more hours, she sends me another email asking me what I'm doing now. Which, again, adorable. Love her.

That brings me back to the whole "thinking" thing. I can only imagine what my sister is going through with the whole growing up thing. I don't even want to imagine what she says and how she says it to her kids when she has to teach them about stuff. I was at a loss when said niece sat down beside me and told me she knew what certain "woman" things were (I won't say it...she's 3 remember!!??!!) And then of course I sit and watch all these true stories of kids getting online and bad things happening so really, I don't want to think about that.

But it's all the other stuff too. I mean, you have kids, you bring home this little bundle and you think ok this baby is going to grow up and live happy and be wonderful etc. Then they have to learn about sex and puberty and right and wrong. Don't talk to strangers, don't get into cars, watch what you're doing, be safe, don't use drugs...on and on and on. And considering how disappointing life can be sometimes...and all the drama you go through with the day to day crap, it's hard to think about how to explain that to a kid but also how I'll feel when she goes through it. I know you have to live your life and learn things...but it's still sad when it happens to me, I can only imagine what it will feel like the first time she gets her heart broken. I don't know if I'm strong enough to go through that with my own kids!

Kind of makes me worried about having my own kids. Because eventually they're going to grow up and not be 3 anymore.

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