Yesterday I said goodbye to our temporary manager.
I'm not really one of those people who handles change all that well. It's actually kind of funny considering I'm the middle child of five. Being in a family of that many you learn many things like patience, tolerance, fairness, and the other hard lessons of life. Which sounds funny but it's true. You learn to adapt and that you don't always get your own way.
Which goes back to me not liking change. In this job, I've learned a lot and have had a great deal of change going on. When I took it, the biggest difficulty was being so far from my family. My sisters were at least two hours away (one was four) and I just felt like I was so far from everyone that knew me. Adapting to that was difficult.
Thankfully I worked with a fantastic woman who I leaned on as a friend and we suffered through and survived. I dubbed us soldiers in the trenches. This job was that kind of job. Always a battle, always some hurdle to get past, always some sort of unique challenge to overcome. When you live in that situation you learn to adapt, to tolerate, to get through.
In a small office, you bond, you get close and you tend to survive things together. Which is why it was somewhat hard to say goodbye to our temporary manager yesterday. She was a great mentor, a great sounding board, a fantastic friend. When you work with a tyrant, it's not difficult to let them go, but when you work with someone who believes in you and treats you with this level of respect, it's sad to see them go.
As happy as I am to have my friend back on Monday from her maternity leave, it's still going to be odd to not see our other manager every day. It's like losing a daily friend. And for us, this will be a unique change. So you can imagine my little bit of sadness when I locked the door behind her yesterday.
Change is good in some instances, but sometimes it's kind of sad.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Friday, May 15, 2009
Did you say it?
I've been off on leave for a week now because of surgery I had last week. Nothing serious. Just regular run of the mill fix me up surgery.
But it's not that that has me in this weird mood tonight. Rather, the time I've had to think that might have been contributing to it.
Last week I got some very devastating news about someone I care about. News that you really don't expect and that punches you in the gut when it happens. I didn't want to think badly about it but I know that it isn't going to end well. And the one thing this person has taught me, is how to love unconditionally. How to recognize the blessings in your life. How to fight for what you believe in. How to be a good person. How to just sit back and let life lead the way.
That set me into thinking about other stuff. And it made me think about the people in my life. The people who make my life what it is. The people I love. How they came here, what purpose they came here for. What they've taught me. How I've learned from them. What impact they've had on my life. It's amazing how one little act can lead to a part of life that fulfills you and makes you whole. Or how someone you wouldn't have even expected can teach you to be a better person when you thought you were the best person you can be.
I also thought about how you need to say it. That's one thing this person taught me. That you can't live your life afraid to say what's on your mind. Afraid to tell people what you want to tell them. That I shouldn't be afraid to say how important someone is to me. So I decided I should say it. And I said it. And I keep saying it.
But sometimes, when you tell someone, it doesn't always elicit the response you hope for. Or the response you are expecting. And in that instance, there's nothing left to say. So I think it's time for me to stop saying it. Because not saying it hurts. But saying it and not saying anything in return hurts more.
So maybe I have nothing left to say.
But it's not that that has me in this weird mood tonight. Rather, the time I've had to think that might have been contributing to it.
Last week I got some very devastating news about someone I care about. News that you really don't expect and that punches you in the gut when it happens. I didn't want to think badly about it but I know that it isn't going to end well. And the one thing this person has taught me, is how to love unconditionally. How to recognize the blessings in your life. How to fight for what you believe in. How to be a good person. How to just sit back and let life lead the way.
That set me into thinking about other stuff. And it made me think about the people in my life. The people who make my life what it is. The people I love. How they came here, what purpose they came here for. What they've taught me. How I've learned from them. What impact they've had on my life. It's amazing how one little act can lead to a part of life that fulfills you and makes you whole. Or how someone you wouldn't have even expected can teach you to be a better person when you thought you were the best person you can be.
I also thought about how you need to say it. That's one thing this person taught me. That you can't live your life afraid to say what's on your mind. Afraid to tell people what you want to tell them. That I shouldn't be afraid to say how important someone is to me. So I decided I should say it. And I said it. And I keep saying it.
But sometimes, when you tell someone, it doesn't always elicit the response you hope for. Or the response you are expecting. And in that instance, there's nothing left to say. So I think it's time for me to stop saying it. Because not saying it hurts. But saying it and not saying anything in return hurts more.
So maybe I have nothing left to say.
Saturday, May 02, 2009
Thoughts
I travelled up to Toronto this week for a conference and the day I went up was one of those grey overcast days where there are mists on the fields and coming off the water (the train travels along beside Lake St. Clair for a bit...) and it's one of those days I LOVE. I don't know what it is about those scenes but they just make me feel really thoughtful, creative, and full of words that I want to spill on paper.
As is always the case, I end up on the train with students (this time I sat beside a Chiropractic student who made me laugh for most of the 4 hours) and that also gets me thinking.
I always say I don't have regrets...I don't...but there are moments I wish I could go back to different times in my life and say things to my old self. Things that might have made me feel better. So if I could...here are some of the things I would say...
Kids are dumb and they do dumb things, you can't make them like you, and them not liking you doesn't make you a bad person.
No, he is not the only man you're going to love.
Yes, you DO deserve better.
Study harder, take that class and work for it. Because it's worth it.
Respecting an elder does not mean always agreeing with them, but you shouldn't always say that out loud.
Please don't say that.
Please don't say that ever.
Please stop saying that.
Don't be afraid to be who you really are. Because those kids won't be your friends no matter who you act like/talk like/follow.
He/She is going to be a lifelong good friend...be good to them.
Go, live, experience. It will all be here when you're finished.
Get it out of your system now and you'll thank me later.
You really shouldn't buy that.
Listen to your heart. Sometimes it's right.
Believe in yourself.
Don't waste your energy being nervous over someone who isn't worth being nervous over.
Stop worrying so much.
Life is too short to spend it trying to be something you're not.
Laugh as hard as you can as much as you can.
Don't be afraid to try.
As is always the case, I end up on the train with students (this time I sat beside a Chiropractic student who made me laugh for most of the 4 hours) and that also gets me thinking.
I always say I don't have regrets...I don't...but there are moments I wish I could go back to different times in my life and say things to my old self. Things that might have made me feel better. So if I could...here are some of the things I would say...
Kids are dumb and they do dumb things, you can't make them like you, and them not liking you doesn't make you a bad person.
No, he is not the only man you're going to love.
Yes, you DO deserve better.
Study harder, take that class and work for it. Because it's worth it.
Respecting an elder does not mean always agreeing with them, but you shouldn't always say that out loud.
Please don't say that.
Please don't say that ever.
Please stop saying that.
Don't be afraid to be who you really are. Because those kids won't be your friends no matter who you act like/talk like/follow.
He/She is going to be a lifelong good friend...be good to them.
Go, live, experience. It will all be here when you're finished.
Get it out of your system now and you'll thank me later.
You really shouldn't buy that.
Listen to your heart. Sometimes it's right.
Believe in yourself.
Don't waste your energy being nervous over someone who isn't worth being nervous over.
Stop worrying so much.
Life is too short to spend it trying to be something you're not.
Laugh as hard as you can as much as you can.
Don't be afraid to try.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Yup, that's me...
Last weekend when I went in to write my two exams the lady in the testing centre said to me "oh so YOU'RE the student..." and I laughed. Yup, that's me. Crazy girl.
Sadly, it took me less time to write TWO exams than the kid writing the exam (and dealing with a killer chest infection) two cubes away. The lady was surprised I finished so quickly but really, there's only so much you can say about federalism and public policy. At least for me. My mind went blank about 20 minutes before I sat down.
And really, two exams wasn't that bad. At least not now. Considering some of the stuff I've had to write and have completed in two hours in my job, this was nothing. At least I got to study for these ones!
Thankfully I have two weeks off to read actual books I like until the next class starts!
Sadly, it took me less time to write TWO exams than the kid writing the exam (and dealing with a killer chest infection) two cubes away. The lady was surprised I finished so quickly but really, there's only so much you can say about federalism and public policy. At least for me. My mind went blank about 20 minutes before I sat down.
And really, two exams wasn't that bad. At least not now. Considering some of the stuff I've had to write and have completed in two hours in my job, this was nothing. At least I got to study for these ones!
Thankfully I have two weeks off to read actual books I like until the next class starts!
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Hee!
So my oldest niece has figured out how to email me. Which is entirely too cute. But it's really opened up this big thought process for me and makes me wonder what/how my sister is a) thinking and b) handling things.
You see, for me, my niece is 3. She will always be 3. She will be 3 when she's dying her hair and painting her nails black. She will be 3 when she's out on her first date. She will be 3 when she walks down the aisle or gives birth. Do you get it? She's 3. And that's that.
So this morning I got up and had two emails. One from my sister and one from my niece. Apparently she is all set up with her own email address and everything and is sending me emails. And the emails are so cute I can't stand it. Then we decided to have a little online chat. And her online chat? So cute I can't stand it. I asked her if she wanted to webcam with me instead so I can see her cute little (3 yo) face but she said no, she LIKES TYPING BETTER. And then she starts spelling words wrong and asking me hilarious questions and telling me what we're doing when I come to visit.
See what I mean? CUTE! And 3!
So after a few more hours, she sends me another email asking me what I'm doing now. Which, again, adorable. Love her.
That brings me back to the whole "thinking" thing. I can only imagine what my sister is going through with the whole growing up thing. I don't even want to imagine what she says and how she says it to her kids when she has to teach them about stuff. I was at a loss when said niece sat down beside me and told me she knew what certain "woman" things were (I won't say it...she's 3 remember!!??!!) And then of course I sit and watch all these true stories of kids getting online and bad things happening so really, I don't want to think about that.
But it's all the other stuff too. I mean, you have kids, you bring home this little bundle and you think ok this baby is going to grow up and live happy and be wonderful etc. Then they have to learn about sex and puberty and right and wrong. Don't talk to strangers, don't get into cars, watch what you're doing, be safe, don't use drugs...on and on and on. And considering how disappointing life can be sometimes...and all the drama you go through with the day to day crap, it's hard to think about how to explain that to a kid but also how I'll feel when she goes through it. I know you have to live your life and learn things...but it's still sad when it happens to me, I can only imagine what it will feel like the first time she gets her heart broken. I don't know if I'm strong enough to go through that with my own kids!
Kind of makes me worried about having my own kids. Because eventually they're going to grow up and not be 3 anymore.
You see, for me, my niece is 3. She will always be 3. She will be 3 when she's dying her hair and painting her nails black. She will be 3 when she's out on her first date. She will be 3 when she walks down the aisle or gives birth. Do you get it? She's 3. And that's that.
So this morning I got up and had two emails. One from my sister and one from my niece. Apparently she is all set up with her own email address and everything and is sending me emails. And the emails are so cute I can't stand it. Then we decided to have a little online chat. And her online chat? So cute I can't stand it. I asked her if she wanted to webcam with me instead so I can see her cute little (3 yo) face but she said no, she LIKES TYPING BETTER. And then she starts spelling words wrong and asking me hilarious questions and telling me what we're doing when I come to visit.
See what I mean? CUTE! And 3!
So after a few more hours, she sends me another email asking me what I'm doing now. Which, again, adorable. Love her.
That brings me back to the whole "thinking" thing. I can only imagine what my sister is going through with the whole growing up thing. I don't even want to imagine what she says and how she says it to her kids when she has to teach them about stuff. I was at a loss when said niece sat down beside me and told me she knew what certain "woman" things were (I won't say it...she's 3 remember!!??!!) And then of course I sit and watch all these true stories of kids getting online and bad things happening so really, I don't want to think about that.
But it's all the other stuff too. I mean, you have kids, you bring home this little bundle and you think ok this baby is going to grow up and live happy and be wonderful etc. Then they have to learn about sex and puberty and right and wrong. Don't talk to strangers, don't get into cars, watch what you're doing, be safe, don't use drugs...on and on and on. And considering how disappointing life can be sometimes...and all the drama you go through with the day to day crap, it's hard to think about how to explain that to a kid but also how I'll feel when she goes through it. I know you have to live your life and learn things...but it's still sad when it happens to me, I can only imagine what it will feel like the first time she gets her heart broken. I don't know if I'm strong enough to go through that with my own kids!
Kind of makes me worried about having my own kids. Because eventually they're going to grow up and not be 3 anymore.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Yikes!
Where did the time go?
I've been bad...but had nothing really great to say...been busy. Work is keeping me busy so I don't want to do anything at night. Then there's school that's also keeping me busy. Next term, only one course. It's not worth it. And then there's all the other drama in life that causes stress. So you can imagine why I've been so silent.
Dexter is still crazy. His new thing is crawling into the mesh waste paper basket and sitting there looking at me like I'M the one who's nuts. Oh and he became a "man" so we had to quickly nip that one (no pun intended). But he's all better now and just as ferocious when it comes to getting treats and wet food.
I'm sure I'll be back with something more fundamental to say eventually.
I've been bad...but had nothing really great to say...been busy. Work is keeping me busy so I don't want to do anything at night. Then there's school that's also keeping me busy. Next term, only one course. It's not worth it. And then there's all the other drama in life that causes stress. So you can imagine why I've been so silent.
Dexter is still crazy. His new thing is crawling into the mesh waste paper basket and sitting there looking at me like I'M the one who's nuts. Oh and he became a "man" so we had to quickly nip that one (no pun intended). But he's all better now and just as ferocious when it comes to getting treats and wet food.
I'm sure I'll be back with something more fundamental to say eventually.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Hello?
Ya, you're not the only ones wondering what's up. I've been busy. Lots of stuff going on at work, at home, with school, with friends...the list is endless and it's at the point where if I'm not doing anything with all that, then I'm sleeping.
I'll be back when I have something more interesting to say.
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
2009!
This year, is gonna be incredible
This year, is gonna be the one
All the planets are lining up for me
This year, I'm gonna have fun
This year, I'll paint my masterpiece
This year, I'll be recognized
I can feel like I'll fall in love for real
This year, this year
~ Chantal Kreviazuk
I think I was going through a bit of a down moment when I posted my last entry. I tend to get like that but thanks to some really great people around me, I was reminded of how most of those pit stops were really lessons on the path I'm on.
But then I think about this year and the things that I'm expecting to have happen...I'm going to buy a house this year (nothing planned but I know it's a goal), I'm finishing my public policy program, I'm hoping to take on more responsibility with work, I'm getting even more healthy...lots of good things are expected this year, and who knows what might come along a little unexpectedly.
So good things...positivity...happiness!
This year, is gonna be the one
All the planets are lining up for me
This year, I'm gonna have fun
This year, I'll paint my masterpiece
This year, I'll be recognized
I can feel like I'll fall in love for real
This year, this year
~ Chantal Kreviazuk
I think I was going through a bit of a down moment when I posted my last entry. I tend to get like that but thanks to some really great people around me, I was reminded of how most of those pit stops were really lessons on the path I'm on.
But then I think about this year and the things that I'm expecting to have happen...I'm going to buy a house this year (nothing planned but I know it's a goal), I'm finishing my public policy program, I'm hoping to take on more responsibility with work, I'm getting even more healthy...lots of good things are expected this year, and who knows what might come along a little unexpectedly.
So good things...positivity...happiness!
Monday, December 29, 2008
Pooped
Christmas is over and this time of year makes me sad and tired. Which really sucks. The holiday was a total whirlwind. The weather made it even worse. Tuesday night I raced around in the snow to try and get the rest of the stuff for the next day so I could leave the city right at one. My brother broke his leg two weeks before and needed us to get the rest of his gifts. So that was my job the Tuesday night.
Christmas was so much fun of course with all the family and my nieces were just adorable. Wouldn't go to bed of course so Santa couldn't come until really late. And then we were all up early the next day. Which led to a really tiring day and one that ended just in time. My sister and I vegged out on Boxing Day and I came home the next day to do mountains of laundry and put everything away.
This week I'm off and I'm taking a few days to just lay around and get some stuff done around the house that I've been wanting to do. Like clean out closets and put stuff away. We're supposed to get another walloping of snow this week so that should be big fun (haha). I have a house party on New Years and then it's back to work next week. People can understand why I'm always so exhausted in the new year.
This time always makes me sad but more so this year. I feel like this year has been full of disappointments in all aspects of my life. Everyone always gives me a hard time about my decisions and what I do with my life so this year I decided it was time to put myself out there, do things that take me out of my comfort zone and just live a little. That worked out well. I was "rejected" in so many areas...my art, my work, my personal life, everything. It was just so hard to take month after month and this past month is no exception. It's like no matter how hard I try I just can't seem to get past this rut. So this year I'm just doing my own thing and playing to the beat of my own drum. I'm so tired of getting my hopes up and then having them dashed. If something good happens, something good happens but I'm afraid I'm not going to go looking for it. Sad really, but it's so much easier to protect myself than get hurt so much.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
It's beginning to look...
....like a white hot mess out there! Yikes! I'm going to need a fat man in a sleigh pulled by reindeer to get to London!
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
New Favourite
This is by far the best show I have seen in a while. Go download it. Really. You won't be disappointed.
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Tagged
I'm stealing this from Jen's blog...
1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper...there's something to be said for piles of presents wrapped up all pretty under the tree. And I love finding cute paper to do it in.
2. Real tree or Artificial? None. I don't have a tree...but the house I spend Christmas at has an artificial one!
3. When do you put up the tree? November 30...my sister's birthday.
4. When do you take the tree down? Shortly after New Year's...
5. Do you like eggnog? Ew. No.
6. Favorite gift received as a child? There are so many...but ones I still have are the Cabbage Patch Dolls and my first doll...aptly named Holly. She's one of the old fashioned ones that her eyes open and close when she's lying down. I think the best part of this gift is watching my niece's face when she figured out her eyes open and close when you lay her down.
7. Hardest person to buy for? I think I fret too much over what to buy people...so that makes it hard...I always end up getting good gifts though.
8. Easiest person to buy for? My nieces...of course!
9. Do you have a nativity scene? No.
10. Mail or email Christmas cards. Mail. I like to make my cards so I try to get some out every year. Last year I had no time so I sent out "hello spring" cards.
11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? I don't think there was one! Oh wait, I was broken up with shortly before Christmas...so maybe that counts!
12. Favorite Christmas Movie? White Christmas
13. When do you start shopping? Sometime around mid November
14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? Nope
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Breakfast, cinammon buns and tea.
16 color lights on tree? white
17. Favorite Christmas song? Oh Holy Night or Angels we have heard on high
18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Travel, I live away from family
19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer's? Absolutely...and I can't ever forget the ninth reindeer Rudolph, or my niece has a fit.
20. Angel on the tree top or a star? star
21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Christmas morning
22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Grouchy people or idiots who are so wrapped up in themselves they don't realize there are other people out in the world.
23. Favorite ornament theme or color? Red and white. But I like all kinds of colours...
24. Favorite for Christmas dinner? Uh, Turkey...is there anything else? Oh and Tortierre...yum!
25. What do you want for Christmas this year? To spend time with family and friends!
1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper...there's something to be said for piles of presents wrapped up all pretty under the tree. And I love finding cute paper to do it in.
2. Real tree or Artificial? None. I don't have a tree...but the house I spend Christmas at has an artificial one!
3. When do you put up the tree? November 30...my sister's birthday.
4. When do you take the tree down? Shortly after New Year's...
5. Do you like eggnog? Ew. No.
6. Favorite gift received as a child? There are so many...but ones I still have are the Cabbage Patch Dolls and my first doll...aptly named Holly. She's one of the old fashioned ones that her eyes open and close when she's lying down. I think the best part of this gift is watching my niece's face when she figured out her eyes open and close when you lay her down.
7. Hardest person to buy for? I think I fret too much over what to buy people...so that makes it hard...I always end up getting good gifts though.
8. Easiest person to buy for? My nieces...of course!
9. Do you have a nativity scene? No.
10. Mail or email Christmas cards. Mail. I like to make my cards so I try to get some out every year. Last year I had no time so I sent out "hello spring" cards.
11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? I don't think there was one! Oh wait, I was broken up with shortly before Christmas...so maybe that counts!
12. Favorite Christmas Movie? White Christmas
13. When do you start shopping? Sometime around mid November
14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? Nope
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Breakfast, cinammon buns and tea.
16 color lights on tree? white
17. Favorite Christmas song? Oh Holy Night or Angels we have heard on high
18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Travel, I live away from family
19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer's? Absolutely...and I can't ever forget the ninth reindeer Rudolph, or my niece has a fit.
20. Angel on the tree top or a star? star
21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Christmas morning
22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Grouchy people or idiots who are so wrapped up in themselves they don't realize there are other people out in the world.
23. Favorite ornament theme or color? Red and white. But I like all kinds of colours...
24. Favorite for Christmas dinner? Uh, Turkey...is there anything else? Oh and Tortierre...yum!
25. What do you want for Christmas this year? To spend time with family and friends!
Friday, December 05, 2008
Busy
I always find that December just kind of slips by you and suddenly it's Christmas and we're into a new year! This is true for this year yet again. Lots of stuff on the go. Lots of adventures. Lots of time spent doing things that normally result in me getting sick after Christmas.
I've been at my sister's for a few days taking care of the kids. And by kids I mean my two nieces and their new puppy. My brother in law surprised my sister with a trip to Vegas for four days to celebrate her 40th birthday and their 15th wedding anniversary. However, they went and got a puppy the week before so I am left to deal with him. And let me tell you, I love my cat even more after this week.
Don't get me wrong, he is abso-freaking-lutely adorable and I just love him, but getting up in the middle of the night to let him out to pee sucks ass. And he whines. And he pees on the carpet. And he needs lots of exercise. And I have plans tomorrow to write an exam and take the girls to the movies but I have to get up, get him organized, get him to my mom's (with the girls) and then go write my exam. Thankfully he had re-discovered his raw hide bone this evening and is entertaining himself with that.
Which brings me to the exam...sigh...what can I say...I hate writing exams. I really wish this could have been one of those "write an essay on this" kind of finals. Rather than a "you have three hours to write two essay, several short answer questions and several multiple choice questions". Oh and by the way...what should we study? Oh everything. Now, considering this course is on government you would think that I would be ok with it, nope, because it's not just on government it's on theories of government. Theories of organizational behaviour. History of how policies came to be. Descriptions of a bunch of old dudes who had ideas about stuff. Big fun I tell you.
Added to that, I am stressing about my mark. And I've resorted to that thing where you sit and torture yourself by saying "ok if I get this mark on the exam I'll end up with this mark in the class" and to make it even worse (like it could get worse...) I haven't gotten the mark back on my last paper. So I'm sitting here doing all these equations...if I got this mark on the paper and then this mark on the exam then I end up with this mark overall. A mark I can live with, but still, it's stressful.
Thankfully I only have four more weeks until the next session starts. I'm starting to seriously reconsider why I decided to do this...but then I remember I did it so I could actually open up the possibility of a job outside of communications. Maybe I need to revisit the "Lesley + Sugar Daddy = no worries" equation.
We'll see how that pans out. For now, back to memorizing old dudes' theories on management.
I've been at my sister's for a few days taking care of the kids. And by kids I mean my two nieces and their new puppy. My brother in law surprised my sister with a trip to Vegas for four days to celebrate her 40th birthday and their 15th wedding anniversary. However, they went and got a puppy the week before so I am left to deal with him. And let me tell you, I love my cat even more after this week.
Don't get me wrong, he is abso-freaking-lutely adorable and I just love him, but getting up in the middle of the night to let him out to pee sucks ass. And he whines. And he pees on the carpet. And he needs lots of exercise. And I have plans tomorrow to write an exam and take the girls to the movies but I have to get up, get him organized, get him to my mom's (with the girls) and then go write my exam. Thankfully he had re-discovered his raw hide bone this evening and is entertaining himself with that.
Which brings me to the exam...sigh...what can I say...I hate writing exams. I really wish this could have been one of those "write an essay on this" kind of finals. Rather than a "you have three hours to write two essay, several short answer questions and several multiple choice questions". Oh and by the way...what should we study? Oh everything. Now, considering this course is on government you would think that I would be ok with it, nope, because it's not just on government it's on theories of government. Theories of organizational behaviour. History of how policies came to be. Descriptions of a bunch of old dudes who had ideas about stuff. Big fun I tell you.
Added to that, I am stressing about my mark. And I've resorted to that thing where you sit and torture yourself by saying "ok if I get this mark on the exam I'll end up with this mark in the class" and to make it even worse (like it could get worse...) I haven't gotten the mark back on my last paper. So I'm sitting here doing all these equations...if I got this mark on the paper and then this mark on the exam then I end up with this mark overall. A mark I can live with, but still, it's stressful.
Thankfully I only have four more weeks until the next session starts. I'm starting to seriously reconsider why I decided to do this...but then I remember I did it so I could actually open up the possibility of a job outside of communications. Maybe I need to revisit the "Lesley + Sugar Daddy = no worries" equation.
We'll see how that pans out. For now, back to memorizing old dudes' theories on management.
Friday, November 21, 2008
Confessions of a weirdo
There's a scene in the Sex and the City movie where Carrie tells Mr. Big that she loves the smell of old books. She goes to the public library and takes out old books and reads them because she loves the smell of them.
I can understand that.
Except it's not just old books. It's new textbooks. New notebooks. Libraries...all of it. And I was reminded of this tonight when I went to the Windsor Law Library. (Big disappointment by the way, I was looking for some materials to write my paper on the rule of law, the constitution and why they're important to public administration...yawn!)
It's probably why I love going back to Western to Weldon Library to go through all the old stacks. I love the smell of the books.
There's something magical about the smell of books. The smell of libraries. It gets me every time I'm in them. It's like some secret place that holds all this knowledge.
When I was a kid, I fell in love with a part of A Tree Grows in Brooklyn where Francie says she wanted to go through every book in the library. I know how she felt. I want to drink in all the knowledge that's in those pages that smell so glorious.
Ok, enough from the crazy girl, she's off to finish her Human Rights paper and start on her Public Administration paper.
I can understand that.
Except it's not just old books. It's new textbooks. New notebooks. Libraries...all of it. And I was reminded of this tonight when I went to the Windsor Law Library. (Big disappointment by the way, I was looking for some materials to write my paper on the rule of law, the constitution and why they're important to public administration...yawn!)
It's probably why I love going back to Western to Weldon Library to go through all the old stacks. I love the smell of the books.
There's something magical about the smell of books. The smell of libraries. It gets me every time I'm in them. It's like some secret place that holds all this knowledge.
When I was a kid, I fell in love with a part of A Tree Grows in Brooklyn where Francie says she wanted to go through every book in the library. I know how she felt. I want to drink in all the knowledge that's in those pages that smell so glorious.
Ok, enough from the crazy girl, she's off to finish her Human Rights paper and start on her Public Administration paper.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Dexter Update
Seeing as Dexter has been with us for a month I guess it's time for an update. He's gotten bigger over the last few weeks and having a cat has taught me so many new and interesting things. Like how to avoid having a cat come flying at you while walking up stairs in the dark (that's not really a fun trick of his) or how claws feel when you're being used as a climbing post. Or just how great it feels to have lower jaws of a teething cat clench your chin.
I am no longer a vet virgin as we travelled to the vet for a booster shot and worm medicine (which has made his tummy very happy) at which time we saw the coolest cat walking around (it was the size of a small dog!).
Dexter has grown a bit but that hasn't stopped him from thinking he's still a baby. He still loves to chase his tail, jump around the table legs and climb up on your lap for a cuddle. We gave him the run of the house last week and he has proven himself a master at entertaining himself all day while we're gone.
He likes to eat people food and sit in the bathtub watching the water drip. He has this weird thing about being in the bathroom with you and walking along the tub while you're in the shower. He has tried to boot it out the door when we come in but he doesn't know what to do with himself once he gets out there.
And of course he likes to tell US what's going on especially when he wants to be fed. That's his normal morning chorus of "feed me Seymour". Oh and he prefers wet food not dry in the morning.
Yes he's a character but we love him. I wouldn't trade this crazy little furball flying squirrel for anything.
Sunday, November 09, 2008
File this under "you've got to be kidding me"
I'm still in love with my car but I've lost a lot of love for the whole process which has been a total and utter pain in the ass. I can understand completely why so many people were unhappy every time I went in to the dealership I purchased from.
It started the day I was on the lot and was looking at the cars. You would think that I would have run that day but I didn't. I really wanted this car and I was willing to put up with it. Who knew how much crap I would put up with. The saleswoman came running out to me when I was out looking at cars. I made a couple of comments about the 2009 Hybrid and the saleswoman was telling me the 2008 was the exact same car...uh no, but thanks. So she says to me...where did you hear all this information? Um, the Detroit Auto Show, in GM's press materials? Still didn't believe me. And her whole attitude was really not going far enough to keep me on the lot. It speaks volumes about how much I really wanted this car.
I went in the next day to order the car. She had a whole pile of information, did she read it? No. Did she have the information I wanted? No. One of the things that really ticked me off was that I wanted the Titanium leather interior but she just wrote down leather interior which lead to the factory just picking the colour for me. Why would this upset me? I paid an extra $1500 for this option for starters.
A couple days later I got a beautiful thank you card for the order...with my name spelled wrong. Which, ok, I can kind of understand if you spell my name wrong if I just say it to you, but it was on my order and she had to look at the address on the order and the name was right above it. Added to that, if you're going to go to the trouble of sending out a thank you card, at least go to the trouble to spell my freaking name right. It's called customer service, look into it.
After about two months I sent her an email asking about the status of my car. Turns out, she didn't have any info. I had to go through a contact at GM with the order number. They found the car. Suddenly, an hour later, she found the car.
Weeks went by and it was time to do the paperwork. I had to do all the leg work for the licencing, the ownership, the insurance, the lease termination etc. I didn't have time for that. Added to that, the saleswoman had little to no interest in doing anything but giving me exasperated emails and phone calls in answer to my concerns. She had absolutely no interest in helping me out or making this easy. I had to beg to be accomodated on the Saturday morning.
I finally got to the point where I just decided enough was enough, I'll just get the car and get it over with. There was a woman in the dealership crying hysterically over the difficulties getting her car. I picked up my car and left. Done. No more worries, no more hassles.
Except not really. She had spelled my name wrong again on the owners manual package so I see that every day. Then I got in my car three days later and realized I had the wrong colour leather interior. I got the cashmere instead of the titanium. Added to that, I wanted the sun roof but didn't get it either.
I know it sounds awful that I'm so nitpicky but this is not a little purchase. To me, this is an expensive luxury item. I invested six months of research on it. I worked hard to get it and I got really excited about it. This was important to me. The fact that there was so little interest in making me happy really spoke volumes about the customer service.
So when the customer service call came in to me that night I unleashed. Not yelling and screaming, just outlined what I was unhappy about and how awful I felt and how I would NEVER recommend Saturn of London to anyone in the future EVER.
Three days later my saleswoman called me to "clear up a few things". Just that alone really ticked me off. So I called her back and let her spin for a bit. She gave me all these excuses and made me feel bad for complaining. And when I pointed out what she did wrong, she insisted I was wrong that she hadn't done anything wrong. You can imagine how upset this made me. To say to me "well I didn't spell your name wrong all the time" and all of the other items really just put me off. So I finally cut her off and just told her flat out, her phone call was making it worse, her sales tactics were apalling and she was ridiculous to think that it would be ok to call me up and pretend to apologize and then make me feel bad for expressing how I felt. She didn't like that either.
The whole situation really left me with a bad taste in my mouth. I love my car. I am very happy with it, but I consider that GM's work, not hers. What she did and what happened at the dealership was just disgusting and I am going to be very careful in the future.
It started the day I was on the lot and was looking at the cars. You would think that I would have run that day but I didn't. I really wanted this car and I was willing to put up with it. Who knew how much crap I would put up with. The saleswoman came running out to me when I was out looking at cars. I made a couple of comments about the 2009 Hybrid and the saleswoman was telling me the 2008 was the exact same car...uh no, but thanks. So she says to me...where did you hear all this information? Um, the Detroit Auto Show, in GM's press materials? Still didn't believe me. And her whole attitude was really not going far enough to keep me on the lot. It speaks volumes about how much I really wanted this car.
I went in the next day to order the car. She had a whole pile of information, did she read it? No. Did she have the information I wanted? No. One of the things that really ticked me off was that I wanted the Titanium leather interior but she just wrote down leather interior which lead to the factory just picking the colour for me. Why would this upset me? I paid an extra $1500 for this option for starters.
A couple days later I got a beautiful thank you card for the order...with my name spelled wrong. Which, ok, I can kind of understand if you spell my name wrong if I just say it to you, but it was on my order and she had to look at the address on the order and the name was right above it. Added to that, if you're going to go to the trouble of sending out a thank you card, at least go to the trouble to spell my freaking name right. It's called customer service, look into it.
After about two months I sent her an email asking about the status of my car. Turns out, she didn't have any info. I had to go through a contact at GM with the order number. They found the car. Suddenly, an hour later, she found the car.
Weeks went by and it was time to do the paperwork. I had to do all the leg work for the licencing, the ownership, the insurance, the lease termination etc. I didn't have time for that. Added to that, the saleswoman had little to no interest in doing anything but giving me exasperated emails and phone calls in answer to my concerns. She had absolutely no interest in helping me out or making this easy. I had to beg to be accomodated on the Saturday morning.
I finally got to the point where I just decided enough was enough, I'll just get the car and get it over with. There was a woman in the dealership crying hysterically over the difficulties getting her car. I picked up my car and left. Done. No more worries, no more hassles.
Except not really. She had spelled my name wrong again on the owners manual package so I see that every day. Then I got in my car three days later and realized I had the wrong colour leather interior. I got the cashmere instead of the titanium. Added to that, I wanted the sun roof but didn't get it either.
I know it sounds awful that I'm so nitpicky but this is not a little purchase. To me, this is an expensive luxury item. I invested six months of research on it. I worked hard to get it and I got really excited about it. This was important to me. The fact that there was so little interest in making me happy really spoke volumes about the customer service.
So when the customer service call came in to me that night I unleashed. Not yelling and screaming, just outlined what I was unhappy about and how awful I felt and how I would NEVER recommend Saturn of London to anyone in the future EVER.
Three days later my saleswoman called me to "clear up a few things". Just that alone really ticked me off. So I called her back and let her spin for a bit. She gave me all these excuses and made me feel bad for complaining. And when I pointed out what she did wrong, she insisted I was wrong that she hadn't done anything wrong. You can imagine how upset this made me. To say to me "well I didn't spell your name wrong all the time" and all of the other items really just put me off. So I finally cut her off and just told her flat out, her phone call was making it worse, her sales tactics were apalling and she was ridiculous to think that it would be ok to call me up and pretend to apologize and then make me feel bad for expressing how I felt. She didn't like that either.
The whole situation really left me with a bad taste in my mouth. I love my car. I am very happy with it, but I consider that GM's work, not hers. What she did and what happened at the dealership was just disgusting and I am going to be very careful in the future.
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
Polarizing
I have spent the last year and a half watching the U.S. political race with baited breath. I was never really a "fan" of Obama and I wondered if it would be a case of people not wanting to vote for him for the racial issues. As things went along my "he's the lesser of two evils" became "maybe this is change to believe in".
Being in Canada, it's easy for us to say we don't have an interest in the election but we do in fact have a very vested interest in it. The U.S. economy affects us, the war affects us and the impact the U.S. has in the world affects us.
But more than the election, more than change, more than anything else, what really moved me yesterday was the sheer volume of people who voted. My biggest thing in elections is voting. It bothers me that more people don't exercise their right to vote. To see so many people voting for the first time and really believing they needed to be there made me so proud. For the first time in a very long time (if not ever) people believed their vote made a difference, that they needed to be there to share in history, that they needed to be a part of change. Watching the lines of voters just made me believe that people can work to change, people can stand up, people believe.
It will be interesting to see how the next four years play out. How he handles the change the U.S. (and possibly the world) needs will be fascinating to watch. I'm proud to be alive in this time. I'm proud of my U.S. neighbours. I'm proud to be a part of history.
Being in Canada, it's easy for us to say we don't have an interest in the election but we do in fact have a very vested interest in it. The U.S. economy affects us, the war affects us and the impact the U.S. has in the world affects us.
But more than the election, more than change, more than anything else, what really moved me yesterday was the sheer volume of people who voted. My biggest thing in elections is voting. It bothers me that more people don't exercise their right to vote. To see so many people voting for the first time and really believing they needed to be there made me so proud. For the first time in a very long time (if not ever) people believed their vote made a difference, that they needed to be there to share in history, that they needed to be a part of change. Watching the lines of voters just made me believe that people can work to change, people can stand up, people believe.
It will be interesting to see how the next four years play out. How he handles the change the U.S. (and possibly the world) needs will be fascinating to watch. I'm proud to be alive in this time. I'm proud of my U.S. neighbours. I'm proud to be a part of history.
Sunday, November 02, 2008
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
That sound you hear? Is me all giddy about my new wheels. It has been three months (well, really, four years of hell with the previous vehicle) to get here but I love it. More and more every day. And it's like I'm a proud momma or something but every time someone compliments me on it, I get all proud and loving!
When I registered with OnStar yesterday they asked me one thing I loved and I said the heated seats. But really, I love the whole thing. I love the engine, I love the colour, I love the interior, I love the exterior, I love the satelitte radio, I love the fact it has it's OWN FREAKING PHONE NUMBER! and I love that it sends me emails to tell me it's doing well. Love love love this car.
What a ride though. I ordered it back in August and it has been nothing but trouble from the get go. The salesperson was not the most pleasant and was actually borderline insulting. I mean, I was buying a $40,000 car and she treated me like I was stealing from them. I had to beg to find out when it would arrive, if it was built yet etc. Added to that, when it did come in, it was a big inconvenience for them to have me come in to get it. I couldn't get here on Thursday or Friday as we had originally agreed due to the other events going on so when I asked for a Saturday appointment they were not at all accomodating.
Added to that, I had to do all the work throughout. I had to call about my lease termination for my last car, I had to deal with GMAC for my payment information, I had to call the insurance company...the list goes on...I had to do all the work. Again, for a car this price, you would think that they would have done a bit more ass kissing and a little less of the "you're putting us out" attitude. I suppose I should have expected it though. The three times I have been in the dealership someone was in there unhappy. Including yesterday with the woman hysterical in tears telling them they could keep their car she didn't want it anymore since it was such a hassle.
I know people who have had additional problems with that dealership and I can guarantee that I won't be going back. Not that I want to be all spoiled and pissy but considering the treatment I got when I bought my little $12000 tin can, this should have been a little easier and not felt like I was hurting them. Especially with the economy the way it is and the fact that I brought that business from an economy that was hurting for this business more.
Sigh....
The good things though...my insurance is actually $120 less a year in this car than it was in my five year old pop can. XM radio, which makes me laugh because I always make a new car CD for my new car and this time I started an iPod playlist but then realized, I have XM radio! So many good things. I'm excited to take it on the highway now because it's safer and drives better. I just love it. I haven't been this happy in a really long time and I'm liking it!
Friday, October 31, 2008
Anniversary
Today marks my third anniversary of my move to Windsor. What's fitting about today is that we celebrated a milestone on the project I work on with a major announcement organized by yours truly.
For the past three weeks I have been completely immersed in this announcement plan. Putting it together, writing the news release, writing the backgrounder, writing the speaking notes, organizing the event details right down to how we would symbolize the completion (no ribbon, just trucks driving down a roadway...it was cool, trust me).
It's fitting because this project has dominated my three years on the project. From the ups and downs of the announcements on this project to the ups and downs of the issues. Kind of like my three years there. Three years of learning, challenges, opportunities and a great deal of growth.
I'm not the same person I was three years ago. I believe I've gotten stronger from the learning experiences. Not just workwise, but also personally as well. It's been three years well spent.
So happy anniversary to me. And here's to more great success!
Monday, October 27, 2008
A fool and her gold
I got some new vanity plates to go with my brand spanking new car. I know, I know...a fool and his gold are soon parted. But I figured, it was worth it! Besides, my plates on the front of my car are slowly losing the paint to chipping. I need new plates anyway so I spent the extra money to get the vanity ones.
AND, I live in Windsor and this is vanity plate central! I need to fit in!
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